how do i start?

umm.. well.. lets see..

starting something has never been my strong point. n u know that by reading just the first two lines. i think i should start from the start by talking about why the start. m standing here at a point where i dont actually feel like standing. been here, like this, stuck for a long time. so long that i ve become used to it and used to hating it way too badly for any emotion a human can bear. everytime i ve tried to get moving, i felt the glue below my shoes grow stronger. what is it? what is stopping me? why m i doing things which i know i shouldnt be doing? i feel this every second i do these things. n so its not a pleasant feeling doing em anymore. it never was. the clock is ticking.. i ve been lagging in the rat race thinking that its just a rat race. i feel i m really late but its not too late. yeah... the only saving grace is that i was born confident. and so somehow, somewhere deep within i still think if i m a running rat, i can be the winning rat. but then.. starting something has never been my strong point.